A Wish List

I am still working through the Moleskinerie archives (I haven’t spent much time on that so I am still working through July 2004).  I have just come across a post by Gary Varner of Inkmusings who wrote the following:

Whenever
any of us face an obstacle or a detour in life, it’s good to try and
find the positive in the experience. Doing so not only lifts our
spirits and yields a glimmer of hope, but sometimes provides the
opportunity to reflect. I’ve spent some of my days while confined
pondering this wake-up call, what it means, what I can change. And
while I’m not yet finished with my stint as a blogging hermit, I have
gained clarity about what I wish for myself once I’m up and dancing
once again.

So here’s my wishes, a brief but not necessarily
complete list to add to my life, once the current hermit-like existence
is retired for good. You may notice these can’t be bought, but are
experiences that can only be sought, and only with intent. None of
these will come easily unless I accept their possibilities and let go
of obstacles in my path.

• I wish to learn more about
  clouds and their shapes, what they mean when they do their heavenly
  dance up there. Then I want to lie on green grass for hours and just
  stare at the them, and let my mind decide what their shapes remind me
  of, like I used to do when I was an idle youth.

• I
  wish never to lose this newly gained slower pace of life. Why do we
  have to be knocked down with a proverbial 2×4 to understand that life
  doesn’t have to be measured by how much we get done in one day, by the
  bulge of our bank accounts, or the number of pages in our resumes?

• I
  wish never to return to the days of loud alarm clocks and panicked feet
  racing through showers and suits just to make a commute on time. I like
  my new early mornings of leisure breakfasts and casual readings of
  paper and email.

This is a wishlist that really appeals to me, especially the last bit about the daily rush.  The wishlist continues ...

• I wish to continue becoming better friends with the
  residents of my bookcases and lose myself in the pages of
  long-ago-bought but little-read volumes of joy and sadness and wonder
  found in those magic pages with all the funny little marks.

• I
  wish to be available to help friends and family who’ve supported me
  through this without complaint. There is no substitute for such support
  from any service or stranger. Nothing works as well as having those
  close to you close to you during hard times.

• I
  wish to accept that music, nature, writing, and reading are not only
  enjoyable pursuits but basic requirements for my sanity. And thus I
  wish to make sure that my life, from now forward, has daily doses of
  all of them.

• I wish to stop thinking about
  and dwelling over those parasitic shoulda-dogmas of my past and stay
  present-minded in today. If life is about the journey and not the
  destination, then what benefit is there in looking backwards or
  wondering what’s around the corner? Here, now, is all that counts and
  all that ever really counted.

• I wish to
  repair friendships of the past, nurture those of the present, and
  cultivate more in the future. Next to health, the depth and breadth of
  friendships significantly impact one’s quality of life more than any
  remaining influence.

• And finally, I wish
  to accept that no journey is pleasurable if the vehicle cannot go the
  distance. Health is more valuable than all the gold and jewels in the
  world, for without it there is no journey of happiness, no pleasure in
  being present-minded. You can read about the wonders of the world from
  the comfort of an armchair, but that’s knowledge not experience. No
  movie or documentary replaces the real-world experience of being there,
  no matter where “there?? is. Thus, I wish to give my body and mind the
  opportunity to carry me through the wonders of my journey ahead.

If
I could compare this list to those I’ve created in the past, I doubt
there would be any similarity. We often wish for riches, or a better
job, a nicer house, a better car. Those things are tangible and subject
to decline, disrepair, and rust. I haven’t mentioned where I’d like to
live, or how, because at this point those aspects are not critical. If
I don’t embrace the essence of the list above, it won’t matter where or
how I live because I’ll simple be repeating mis-steps of the past. And
it’s not that my life has been a criminal waste, far from it. But the
glory tends to be in the details, in that last ten percent of how we
live our lives, and I believe and hope through making these wishes come
true I can bridge that final ten percent.